How to deal with an obesessive ex?

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Permalink Reply by Janer on November 10, 2009 at 6:39am

well, i did a little legal info searching for your state, and it turns out that this behaviour (if it's causing you distress) is covered under harrassment for which you can file for an order of protection :)

oh, and since he's the father of your child, he's considered a "family or household member" which means you won't have to pay to file for the order :)

here's the site

http://apps.leg.wa.gov/RCW/default.aspx?cite=10.14

hope that helps. Don't put up with it. it's all about control.

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Permalink Reply by WhisperingWinds on November 10, 2009 at 7:06am

you can get a restraining order if it gets ugly if he mets your states laws to get one.
i had to for a guy i dated. i dated him briefly and he stalked me for a long time. he was married. i did not know it when we met. i eventually had to get a gun. he woud show up in the work parking lot at malls.

my first husband did something similar for a time then i moved, hid my address and phone. he got a hold of my po box key. you cannot help him get on with his life but you m ust yours. he sounds like he is bipolar or something like that. that i was what i suspect my stbx is. talk to legal aid for adivce. the stalker i had i later fouind he had that cutting thing going on.

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Permalink Reply by Nina73 on November 12, 2009 at 6:42am

Hiya
I just had to read this as it felt as tho someone had written about me....i was in exactly the same position (x10!!) my ex was controlling, obsessive and it went on for more then 3 years after we had officially broke up and i had told him over and over i didnt love him anymore and that i would not take him back (he had cheated on me for over a year behind my back and had even a baby with the other woman..wtf?) i thought i would never get rid of him and whenever i dated someone he was there to spoil it...he even went as far as threatening one of the guys i dated.

But as time went by, there were numerous times when he got really scary and finally i called the police on him...its the only way. It became an eye opener for him and after that life got better. I decided to move and start a new life which also helped.

Dont put up with as long as i did. Get help.

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Permalink Reply by Leilani on November 14, 2009 at 1:41pm

Thanks to everyone who commented! I knew it would eventually come down to getting the law involved, but I just never wanted to really face it. I hope that I'll find the strength to go through with filing papers and everything. Better now than once it's too late, wishing I'd done something sooner.

Wish me luck!

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Permalink Reply by rebecca on November 22, 2009 at 7:29pm

I know this all too well I exprienced it first hand....

It all about control.... He is flipping out because he thought you would be waiting for him... As he realized he is alone and has lost all control over you, he doesnt know what to do so he threatens you thinking thats gonna make you love him again...

Eventually he will get physical . You should get a restraining order for your safety and your child...

You cant help him... He did get on with his life remember he left you for someone else.....

Good Luck and take care!

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