Help am I waisting my time????????????????

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Permalink Reply by Travis on November 15, 2009 at 8:40pm

Their may be a lot under the surface that we don't know. but, for him to move on, he needs to stop communicating with her, it will always leave the door open for him to go back. Especially if he is saying things like "...I gave you a chance..." They are still talking about the relationship.

Having him go to your families event, could be a good thing, but you two need to talk, and have a good serious conversation about where he stands with her, and what he wants with you. And maybe talk about how his communication with his ex is affecting you, and possibly have that end. If he is wanting to be with you, he will address the things that are not making you happy, as what you feel and think are valid.

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Permalink Reply by WhisperingWinds on November 16, 2009 at 7:06am

travis your first line is soooo true. my extobe did this all the time and then accussed me of having unfinished biz with otthers. so when he went back to an ex i was not surprised. hell, he was digging info about his ex wife years aftt they split. he wanted to know if she was remarried, what her name was on in property. if a mate wants you to go to family events but then will not go with you that is big red flag. this stbx did that. he made me to go to family function then when my mom died he refused to co me to the funeral. that was the beginning of the end.
i had ex gf of his caling the house. calling his work. he put them a priority over me. when i left he got mad then said he need them to not be lonely. never mind i was when i moved to cnd. if he is not loyal now he never will be. he is not commited to you.
travis is wise.

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Permalink Reply by Jenny on December 7, 2009 at 6:28pm

hey girl! I feel you on this one! i just like you was single for 5 years. .and I was doing really good and loving it all.. then one day I just met this guy and well.. I think you were the one that wrote me back to leave him actually if I am not mistaken. Hehe. Well, I would talk to him first and be very honest about how you feel. If he tries to throw it back at you like you are crazy.. ask him: "and If I had another guy texting and wanting to be with me while we were together you would feel?" It seems like some people cannot really get it until you put them in your shoes (mentally).. my ex talked about his ex girlfriends all the time!! i can't go there as it is so hurtful.. I was patient but then he seemed to always know his ex's whereabouts (to this day) and what is going on in her life. I even went so far as to shred pictures of old guys I had forgotten to throw to SHOW him how to go on.. he said "I will bring mine over tomorrow.. never happened.. you are NOT crazy! I like you am not really a jealous type and well this guy made me question alot about myself in a not so good way.. if he is true he will cut this girl off.. you are not just some young single girl with no responsibilites and only REAL MEN need apply!!! Turns out that its not that we are not worth it.. its that they are not where we are at... It would be safe to talk to him (this will reveal how he can handle honesty.. and then see what he does..) he doesn't get it.. take some time and then say "good-bye" If he loves you then he will be with you.. Wise as a serpent, Gentle as a dove.. he never really detached from this girl.. my ex's girlfriend broke it off with him as well and I can tell he never dealt with things and was kind of using me as a crutch to help him get over it... no seriousness from you until he can show some towards you.. if he loves you he will come to understand.. if not.. well.. you and I both KNOW "The grass on the other side is only artificial turf" so he can go on to little miss turf then.. we single parents have alot to offer.. if the others would just catch up to us and get their stuff together.. you are awesome and very right to question this.. test his heart a little.. I broke up with my ex a week ago and already have guys like "bout time your single.. we missed the real you.." the guy made me sad alot and I was always crying.. not like me really :) In your case though I hope he is true because I know what it is to start to really like someone (or love) and then get crushed. We have kids to take care of and just can't afford the extra heart ache... Blessings! I pray his heart is really for you hun! :)

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